Still feeling a little “under water” from my last chemo session last Thursday, I wanted to write on my blog. Just because I am out of breath doesn’t mean I don’t have something say or to contribute to the universe.
When I was very young, I must have been about 5 years old, I was complaining to my Father about something trivial and how it wasn’t fair. My Father’s quick but contained response was ”Don’t ever think that life is fair Seana. You will be disappointed if you do”. I understood exactly what he meant back then and I understand it even more today.
Life is not fair and don’t ever let anyone trick you into thinking that it is. I could go on for pages and pages about this or that not being fair. Let’s just cut to the chase – None of it is fair and that is why it is called LIFE. As sad and harsh as that may sound, it is a real statement and it comes from a very real part of my soul and upbringing.
I learned the term “pulling the plug” and the importance of it at the ripe age of 7 years old when I visited my father in the intensive care unit after his first triple bypass surgery at the age of 40. Wow, 1976 may have been America’s 200th birthday but during that summer it felt like the end of time to me. This was not fair, but it was educational and helped create who I am today. It really wasn’t that the next year my grandfather would suddenly die while under anesthesia for knee surgery. That too was a learning experience about medicine and blood clots. I learned life’s lessons very young. They are a part of my rock solid foundation and make me the realist that I am.
While cruising through the net today, I came across this and thought I would share. Charles Sykes is the author of DUMBING DOWN OUR KIDS. The following is a list he created for high school and college graduates of things he did not learn in school. In his book, he talks about how the “system” may have created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and set them up for failure in the real world.
Rule 1: Life is not fair; get used to it.
Rule 2: The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3: You will not make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice president with a car phone until you “earn” both.
Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn’t have tenure.
Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger-flipping; they called it opportunity.
Rule 6: If you screw up, it’s not your parents’ fault so don’t whine about your mistakes. Learn from them.
Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning your room, and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. So before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents’ generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades, they’ll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life.
Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off, and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.
Rule 10: Television is not real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.
The book again is Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why America’s children feel good about themselves but can’t read, write, or add.
It is up to all of us to teach our children how unfair this world can be sometimes. This way they don’t get taken by surprise as adults.